It’s Mother’s Day once again. I am blessed to have celebrated over forty Mother’s Days. Before we had kids, we were guilty of making “my kid will never…” statements. Words we soon learned to eat. I discovered a clever kitchen towel a few months ago that read,

“As soon as you say, “My child would never, here they come nevering like they never nevered before.” 

That sums it up nicely. I remember when our boys were young and on the move. I kept putting the things I didn’t want them to touch higher and higher. They saw that as a challenge to try harder. One formed a staircase out of the cabinet drawers and went upward. 

Little kids, little problems. When they were little, I knew where they were at night, tucked into their beds. They were safe and secure. The worst thing I had to worry about was a diaper blowout in public and not having a spare, but then it happened; One kid sprung a leak at the mall that covered my white skirt with mustard poops. Check that never box.

We persevered through five personalities and both sexes through every situation. The same scenario might elicit five different reactions. I had runners, pokers, riders, and hiders to track everywhere we went. Where’s Melissa? Chris, get back here; Andrew, catch up, please. Where’s Nic? Did anyone see where Rebecca went? Our kids probably thought Dad and I couldn’t count past five for most of their lives. One-two-three—four… where’s Melissa?

Bigger kids, bigger problems. Once they began school and their sphere of influence grew, we had opposing viewpoints to battle. 

Maaahm, when do we get a Nintendo? Ryan has one; he wants to play Mortal Kombat.

Never. 

When do I hang out at the mall with a boy like Kelly? (said the ten-year-old) 

Same answer for Nintendo. 

Give that precious child a cell phone and a license, and you’ll have more trouble than you dreamed possible. Freedom and access to the world in the hands of a child. What was humanity thinking?

Overall, our kids were perfect, respectful, and maintained the curfews. They were always responsible and obedient, said the naïve mother, completely unaware of the lengths a teen will go to get what they want. Occasionally, when they all get together, and their children are in bed, they laugh about the shenanigans they got past us. I learned things I am glad I didn’t know at the time.

As humans, we learn by doing. We learn what is good and fun and what is dangerous and rebellious, who is a good friend, and who will betray. We’ve all been there and done things we wished we hadn’t and are lucky to have survived. Most times, those are precious learning opportunities.

I’ve had the pleasure of speaking with moms whose children are still in the various stages of crazy. On this Mother’s Day, I just want to throw out a few thoughts on surviving:

1-Start young, making family prayer a regular part of the day. Continue it throughout their lives.

2-Go to Mary frequently. Christ’s Mother is a prayer warrior and a miracle maker. She is closest to Him. Place yourself and your family under her protective mantle. 

3-Be firm and loving, but do not save them from the natural consequences of their actions. Those are incredible learning opportunities.

4-Trust your gut. You know your kids best. They don’t need a friend; they need a mother.

5-Don’t overthink things. Don’t punish yourself with worry. Give it to God.

6-Keep your sense of humor. Smile when you want to scream; it’s more effective.

7-Do your best; there will be good and better days. Thank the Lord and move forward. 

8-Have fun together. Make happy memories.

9-My Mother tells me often, “Be good to yourself.” Wise advice indeed!

10-Don’t sweat the little things. Laundry and dishes always need to be done, so take advantage of precious moments with your spouse instead of fretting about the chores.

Our kids did many of the usual antics that cause grief in a parent’s life. At times, it can feel as if you raised Atilla the Hun. But twenty-five years on the other side of crazy gives me more perspective and time to see how God has worked in their lives. We only see the moment and God sees how everything fits in the big picture. Never underestimate the power of your prayers for them. God loves them more than you do and desires their happiness. I spent untold hours on my knees, rosary in hand, tears on my cheeks. I entrusted them to the heart and care of their Blessed Mother. I am astounded at the fruit of those prayers in their lives. They may have pulled off some zingers in their young years, but they turned out magnificently through God’s grace and our prayers. They are hard-working, faithful, and hilarious. They are incredible spouses and parents. We couldn’t be more proud or grateful to God.

A mother is irreplaceable. Her impact on her children lasts a lifetime. Do not doubt your value or contribution to your family and society. Your influence impacts generations.  On this Mother’s Day, own it, girl!

The world may underestimate your value, but I am here to confirm that it is priceless.  

Happy Mother’s Day, and thanks kids for making me one tough Mudder!