It’s easy to distinguish when a child is happy or unhappy because they give clear signs which indicate their feelings. There are times when we could misread their emotions and cause further distress. Hence, the guessing game begins. Are you hungry? Does your tummy hurt? Are you tired? Is your diaper full; followed by sniffing their back end or taking a peek. Do you have a boo boo?

Band-Aids, I’ve discovered, can fix almost anything in a child’s mind. Affixing a colorful strip somewhere in the general vicinity of the ‘ouchy,’ is like magic.

This is the time-honored repartee used for adult/small child interactions.

When we move to an adult/teen conversation, it becomes muddier and complicated due to all that accompanies that stage of life?

Parent: You seem more temperamental than usual, what’s going on?

Teen: You don’t care what happens to me. You don’t get it. You just want to ruin my life. You’re a fun sucker!

Parent: What are you talking about?

Teen: See. I told you. You hate me.

Parent: Is there somewhere I can put a Band-Aid?

Ok, I’ll admit I had some whacko years that still creep up from the depths of my psyche. And yes, I was called a fun sucker more times than I could count. But hey, we all survived. The same teen who was totally grossed out by butt sniffing is now a father doing so. What do they call that? Oh yah, Karma!

As confusing as dealing with almost adults can be, comes interactions with actual adults, or those designated such by their age. No longer can you expect clear signs or dialogue as indicators of what’s going on in their minds.

Claudia: Good morning! Did you get a chance to finish that report yet?

Jeffrey: Silence. (Sips coffee, while looking intently out the window with his back to her.)

Claudia: The one due three days ago. Are you ok? I know it’s been tough lately with all the PTO you’ve been using. I couldn’t help but notice all the fun photos you’ve posted while you were away.

Jeffrey: (sipping silently, continuing to stare out the window).

Claudia: Hello Jeff, anybody home? You know, life isn’t easy for me either but I’m here at work. I haven’t had a shower in three days. I’m sure you smell me coming. And my dog has ticks. Nobody ever takes me seriously. You think its fun being the boss? I see you all whispering about me, never inviting me to your little happy hours. (Tears begin to roll down her cheeks,) I just feel so alone, like nobody even cares or notices me. (Sniff, sniff)

Jeffrey: (startled and practically spilling his coffee). Oh hey, I didn’t see you there, (removing his ear buds). I was just finishing up my rosary. Did you get the report I emailed yesterday?

Are you crying? Is everything alright? Do you need a Band-Aid?

Recently we visited the Louvre and saw the famous painting by Paolo Veronese, (1563), called the Wedding at Cana. Not only is it huge, but it is also a microcosm of humanity. One could study all the goings-on in this painting for hours.

What struck me most, is the face of Christ. He is in the center of all that is human, yet his face is what I describe as, an intimate knowing and serenity. He is in the world, but not of the world. Here in their midst sits, the peace the world cannot give.

Humans learn best by experience. These lessons are what teach us the optimal way to live with one another, to interact in various situations and personalities and ultimately, what it means to love and be loved. I’ve always wondered as I reflected on Scripture, why previous to the Exodus, Pharaoh’s heart was hardened despite the personal cost to him, and to his people. Why too, are we so hardheaded and obstinate in the face of obvious truth? Fr. Mike Schmitz put it this way, in the fire of God’s love, our hearts will either melt like wax or harden like clay in a kiln. Which is yours?

We must pay attention to the signs of our times. Whining like cranki-pants hoping things will just get better is counterproductive. A Band-Aid will not fix this mess. As adults, we must use our freedom wisely. Prayer and a willingness to let God make use of our pliable hearts like wax fashioned and molded in the Masters hands is a good place to begin.